College Stories. My Girlfriend Is Too Naive--- Free -

Last month, I had a breakdown. I came back from a brutal organic chemistry exam, convinced I had failed and ruined my pre-med track. I flopped onto her dorm bed and announced that my life was over.

She is a political science major who believes that every politician is “trying their best.” She once wrote a five-page paper arguing that negative attack ads should be illegal because they hurt people’s feelings. Her professor gave her a C+ and wrote “Bless your heart” in the margin. She framed it. College Stories. My Girlfriend Is Too Naive--- Free

And me? I’ve stopped grabbing her arm. Now I just stand next to her, watching the world try to take advantage of my impossibly trusting girlfriend. Last month, I had a breakdown

My girlfriend, Emily, is too naïve for college. And I mean that with every ounce of love and terror in my heart. She is a political science major who believes

“I see the guys in the dining hall stealing from the penny tray,” she continued. “I know the landlord was lying about the water feature. I’m not confused. I just don’t want to spend my energy being suspicious. I’d rather be wrong sometimes and be happy most of the time.”

I used to try to fix her. I’d grab her arm when she tried to give her spare change to the guy selling “university-branded” umbrellas out of a van. I’d whisper, “He’s not affiliated with the school, Em. That’s a felony.” She’d just smile and say, “Or maybe he’s an entrepreneur!”

That’s the trick. Naïveté isn’t a lack of intelligence. It’s a refusal to let the world harden you. Emily has a 3.9 GPA. She can recite Supreme Court cases from memory. She taught herself Python over winter break because she was “bored.” But she still believes that if you just explain your feelings clearly enough, the campus parking authority will forgive your ticket.