On the farthest edge of the Peak District, where the stone walls crumble faster than the 4G signal, sixty-seven-year-old Margaret “Maggie” Trotter faced her greatest trial since she’d buried her husband. She needed to download the BBC’s 1995 Pride and Prejudice —all six glorious, Colin-Firth-in-a-wet-shirt hours of it.

“He apologized and changed,” Lily whispered. “Men don’t do that.”

Maggie nodded gravely. “Then we start now.” The download began at 4:17 PM. Raj named the file darcy_never_fails.avi .

“Same principle,” she said. “Patience and a second proposal.”